TRADES, TRIUMPHS AND (MAYBE) TRAGEDY

DEEP DOO FOR DARWIN?

MURLOCS MAKE THE RIGHT MOVES

Madtown---Energized by a pair of high-profile trades, the Murlocs took on the league’s winningest club (the Darwin Finches) and prevailed in a pitcher’s duel behind the shutout pitching of Jered Weaver (7-8, 3.61) and a clutch hit by little-used third catcher Rod Barajas to prevail 2-0 on Game Day 79!

The Finches had sent out Josh Johnson, whose 11 wins led the league and whose other numbers were among the league leaders: a 2.81 ERA (3rd), 115.1 IP (5th) and 75 strikeouts (7th). And Johnson, true to form, scattered three hits over seven innings. But in the middle of the seventh, a 59-minute rain delay allowed Johnson’s arm to stiffen and he could not continue. Weaver, meanwhile, had matched Johnson for each goose egg, and was able to continue working into the eighth.

In the top of that inning, rookie Max Scherzer fanned the first batter he faced (RF Hunter Pence). But Dan Uggla (pinch-hitting for Freddie Sanchez) drew a walk. The Murlocs then called upon Barajas to pinch-hit for LF Chris Burke. Barajas had appeared in only a handful of games as a defensive replacement for Jorge Posada, but the wet conditions didn’t dampen his bat: he swung at the first pitch from the hard-throwing Scherzer (1-3, 6.52) and roped it down the line, over the wall in left, a two-run shot!

That was all that Weaver would need! The unsung hero of the Murlocs staff, Weaver would retire the last six hitters he faced for his BARB-leading third shutout of the year, and the former Luchadores had won for the fourth time in their last five games to improve to 31-49.

BRAGA MAKES MARK

It doesn’t hurt to get a clutch homer from an all-but-forgotten benchwarmer to beat your division leader, but the Murlocs were also buoyed by a pair of trades with BARB rivals that involved Madtown cashing in some recently-exercised draft picks. GM Jeff ‘Chops’ Braga reacquired former LH starter Zach Duke (3-9, 6.09) from the Texas Tornadoes for the price of right-handed pitching prospect Andrew Bailey. According to ‘Chops’, "The starting rotation has been plagued with the injury bug, and Duke will be a great asset to the rotation since he is only 26 years old and has many more years to play. In addition, a little bit of salary is saved by making the deal.”

Not standing on ceremony, the Murlocs then packaged away two prospects (LHP Zach Wheeler and RHP Matt Hobgood) for unappreciated Fresno closer Brian Wilson (9.39 ERA in 9 games. ‘Chops’ remarked, “Losing two picks is big, but to receive a proven closer, especially with one getting close to retirement (Mariano Rivera), it was nice to get a great replacement. Plus this trade also saves some salary as well. This was a win-win trade for both teams."

DARWIN: FACING SUSPENSIONS?

Office of the League Commissioner----A pair of surprising revelations of past indiscretions have caught the Darwin Finches in the crosshairs of unfavorable public inquiry and scandal, league officials confirmed, and it is likely that the Unnatural Selections (currently leading all BARB teams in the standings) could face suspensions or other sanctions from the league office. At the center of the crosshairs? Left-handed sluggers Josh Hamilton and David Ortiz!


Hamilton, currently on his second stint on BARB’s disabled list, has publicly acknowledged a violation of his substance abuse program back in January of this year, which became public knowledge when photographs of the Finches star were placed on a web site that showed Hamilton (a married man) ‘partying’ with a group of women in an Arizona bar. Hamilton's thoughts on the subject can be heard here.

Ortiz, the club’s franchise player and (usually) designated hitter, has been fingered by federal investigators as a ‘person of interest’ in the BALCO investigations that have swept up the (mercifully) retired Barry Bonds (Frostbite Falls) and the presently-suspended Manny Ramirez (Madtown). Ortiz denies either criminal wrongdoing or deliberately violating MLB’s policies on the use of what are now being termed ‘PED’s’ (performance-enhancing drugs)….but, as with Hamilton, a shadow has now fallen on the franchise.

“We are investigating the merits of their respective cases,” admitted Commissioner Scott Hatfield. “Mr. Ortiz supposedly has been forthcoming, as has Mr. Hamilton. And yet, we learned about this not back in 2004, when Mr. Ortiz allegedly tested positive, nor earlier this year, when by his own admission Mr. Hamilton suffered a ‘relapse’. We think it is important that any team associated with our office in any way be held to the highest possible standard, and while no criminal charges have been filed, we think some kind of public consequence is likely in this unfortunate situation. Too often, this league has turned a blind eye to misconduct of this sort. That has to change.”

BLACK MESA, CASSELTON MULL TOUGH CHOICES

Insiders reported that the Black Mesa Anomalies have been attempting to deal some of their extra outfielders for either pitching or catching help, but in general players like Reed Johnson or Scott Hairston haven’t drawn much interest. Some speculate that the Anomalies may release one or more players to clear roster spots for rookies or even possible free agent signings, and in doing so may be forced to eat significant amounts of salary.

Meanwhile, the Casselton Horned Toads seem stuck with some players who are not contributing (such as 3B Melvin Mora), or who would seem to be a better fit as a starter for some other club (such as Geovanny Soto). As with Black Mesa, the Commissioner’s Office agreed that changes were imminent but stopped short of declaring either team as being out of compliance. “We’re monitoring their situations,” said Commissioner Scott Hatfield, “and we hope that moves will be made to, ah, align themselves with what our office considers to be, um, best practice. No more questions, please.”

In other BARB action:

BROOKLYN 7, POTTSYLVANIA 2

WP: Scott Baker (4-3, 2.88)
LP: Cliff Lee (6-7, 3.95)

Troy Tulowitzki doubled in a pair of runs in a three-run second and made a pair of sparkling defensive plays to rob Ryan Theriot of base hits, and the Moabs (42-38) stayed within five games of East-leading Worcester.

CASSELTON 14, WORCESTER 4

WP: John Lackey (5-3, 4.06)
LP: Jair Jurrjens (2-2, 5.19)

The Horned Toads clubbed Jair Jurrjens making a spot start for the injured Eric Bedard, as former Eliminator 3B Garret Atkins drove in four runs with three hits, including his sixth boundary belt of the year, as Casselton (44-33) maintained a three-game lead in the Central.

BLACK MESA 5, YUMA 3
WP: Jarrod Washburn (5-3, 4.55)
LP: Roy Halladay (8-5, 3.74)
SV: Papelbon (21)

Adam Dunn and Ian Kinsler each hit two-run homers, and Jonathan Papelbon retired the last five Yuma hitters for his BARB-leading 21st save, as the Anomalies (in the middle of paring their roster) improved to 38-42. Black Mesa leads all of BARB with 431 runs scored.

BONDS MARKET BLEAK

I've written at length about how I feel about Barry Bonds before, here and here. Basically, I'm not a Bonds basher. I think he was the greatest hitter of my generation, and I think he deserves to be in Cooperstown. But I also think that the highly-competitive Bonds camp sought a competitive advantage through means that may or may not have been legal, but which are almost certainly unethical, and I can also distinguish between Bonds the player (who is without peer) and Bonds, a complex and flawed human being.

Here's another example of the latter. Barry and his agent are seemingly baffled that a guy who was in last year's All-Star Game, who hit 28 HR and led the world in on-base percentage, should still be without a job nearly 12 months later. In effect, one wonders, 'why is the Bonds market so poor?' or, in his agent's words, 'bleak' ?

Well, Barry, it's really very simple.

Let me explain it for you and your agent, Jeff Borris . . . .

It's because a lot of people just don't like you.

This has always been true, but it's more true today than three years ago, even in the Bay area. You've reached the point in your career where that weighs more heavily in people's minds than in what you could do to help their team win. The choices that you've made over the years and the costs associated with them have come home to roost.

You're a proud man, so I know you'll take this in stride. Some day, if you come clean, really humbly acknowledge where things should've been done differently, you may find more acceptance. But right now, you're the most skilled unemployed baseball player in the world.

MORE RED MEAT

For those of you who want to see how the Rocket fares in the red glare of the media spotlight . . .

HOW COME I GOTS NO OFFERS?

You know, this story reminds me of emails I occasionally receive from BARB owners who want to know how, How, HOW is it possible that [Player X] has [fill in the number][stats]?

Gee, I don't know, Barry: maybe it's because the rest of baseball regards you as a leper? I mean, the last time I checked, no one was seeking Marilyn Manson's endorsement in the current election cycle. . . .

YOUR CHEATING HEART

Weirder and weirder still.

A COMMON PROBLEM

This isn't as big a problem as it used to be, but it's still with baseball, which is the fascinating habit of players whose vital statistics just aren't legit. Steve Garvey was for many years listed as 5'11'' in media guides, for example, but he was much closer to 5'9". Who really believes that Bartolo Colon is actually a mere 245 pounds, for that matter?

But perhaps the most egregious whoppers are the birthdates, and these are typically perpetuated by Latin ballplayers. Phony birth certificates or names changed to match the (younger) birth certificates of other countrymen, etc.----this is just the way business has been done in certain countries, for a long time. Anyone who believes that 1981 Rookie of the Year Fernando Valenzuela was actually 20 years old at the time...well....I've got a bridge to sell 'ya.

Now, of late baseball has changed its policies on assisting foreign nationals obtain visas to play in the United States, which in turn is a response to tightening of immigration policy in the wake of 9/11. As a result, a few years ago, quite a few young Latin ballplayers became...well....older, overnight.

So this confession, on the part of S-Mart's new shortstop, is hardly unexpected. They say that confession is good for the soul. Now that we know this guy fiddled with his age along with his biochemistry (as the Mitchell Report indicts), we can no doubt wrap him in the arms of forgiveness. Seriously, though, where is the outrage? Everyone was P.O.'ed when Rafael Palmeiro threw Tejada under the bus, but apparently that particular cheater knew something.

LY 0....?

This story keeps getting weirder and weirder.

WHEN THE TRUTH HURTS

This is what happens.

A TALE OF THREE MILLIONAIRES

Two pitchers, with different pitches.

One slugger, facing a full count.

As your Commissioner, it is my pledge that no player (even a virtual player) is above the law. Unfortunately, the age of the players and my desire to support the principle that even crooks deserve their day in court makes it difficult for me to believe that any action, either on our part or in 'reality', is likely to make a difference.

Still, here goes: we're past the point of pleading 'misunderstanding.' Either Clemens and Bonds are lying, or the people pursuing them are. Bonds has been indicted, but other than that they look pretty much the same from where I sit: privileged superstars who've lawyered up while facing charges of perjury. I'm disgusted.

NEWS FROM THE WEIRD

Apparently it's not enough that to light a fire in the Rocket's red glare. The trainer that accuses Clemens of steroid and HGH use is now naming Clemens' wife as another person he injected. And (shades of Court TV) this same McNamee now claims the he has kept in his possession used syringes and other artifacts that, if tested, could link Clemens to individual injections.

This is going to get worse before it gets better, I think.

ANOTHER CURIOUSITY

This Congressional steroids stuff keeps getting interesting. First Clemens drags his feet, and now his former teammate, Chuck Knoblauch, seems to be in hiding. Knoblauch has yet to be served with a subpoena even though federal marshals have been looking for him for four days. For more info, read here. Curious, no?

CLEMENS SPEAKS OUT

More than 200,000 people have watched this, why shouldn't BARB owners, as well? Roger Clemens speaks in a video which he himself apparently created and uploaded to YouTube. Unfortunately, the HTML to embed the video on Blogger is not available (probably by Clemens's choice, to reduce the possibility of parodies), so you'll have to enter this search string:

http://www.youtube.com/wrclemens

PEAVY: CLEMENS 'JAKE' BY HIM

With Yuma leading the Series 2-1, questions have emerged about projected starter Roger Clemens, as the veteran has been dogged by allegations of the use of HGH and other performance enhancing substances.

Firebirds pitcher Jake Peavy, a 10-2 loser in Game Three, was vocal in protesting this development. Peavy considers Roger Clemens more than a teammate. To Peavy, “The Rocket” is a friend and a mentor, and is inclined to trust that the seven-time Cy Young Award winner is telling the truth.

“Obviously, I’m saddened by the news surrounding the Mitchell report,” Peavy wrote. “... I'm not sure of any of the details and I'm certainly not going to go Curt Schilling on him (I thought that was absolutely ridiculous), but I am going to support him as a friend. I'm sure in time the truth will come out in everyone's case as it has in the few guys who I have heard speak on the matter. I haven't spoken with Roger, but have heard the comment on him saying he never took steroids, so that is what I believe. I understand the questions surrounding him because of this report, but who's to say the report is totally accurate? So, on this end, I'm certainly not going to rush to any judgment until I hear more and stand by a friend who denies it!”

THE SHAME OF IT ALL

At a time when BARB fans should be reveling in the heroics of the post-season, reality intrudes in the ugliest way. The Mitchell Report has named names, casting a shadow on the feats of some Hall of Fame talent, among them three Yuma stars: RHP Roger Clemens, 2B Brian Roberts and SS Miguel Tejada. The full text of the report can be found here. What, if anything, will be the outcome of this?

"As your Commissioner, I'm committed to a clean, honest, game," claimed Scott Hatfield, the Sage Czar of Baseball. "If this was back in Judge Landis's day, hearsay would be sufficient for a lifetime ban. But it isn't. I'm reluctant to punish teams for the alleged sins of the players. But I have to say this: all of the owners who have not-so-quietly been lobbying for sanctions against Barry Bonds, what do they think I should do about this can of worms?"

The can of worms is extensive, as the following list shows:

Chad Allen Mike Bell Gary Bennett Larry Bigbie Kevin Brown Alex Cabrera Mark Carreon Jason Christiansen Howie Clark Roger Clemens Jack Cust Brendan Donnelly Chris Donnels Matt Franco Eric Gagne Matt Herges Phil Hiatt Glenallen Hill Todd Hundley Mike Judd David Justice Chuck Knoblauch Tim Laker Mike Lansing Paul Lo Duca Nook Logan Josias Manzanillo Cody McKay Kent Mercker Bart Miadich Hal Morris Daniel Naulty Denny Neagle Jim Parque Luis Perez Andy Pettitte Adam Piatt Todd Pratt Stephen Randolph Adam Riggs Armando Rios Brian Roberts F.P. Santangelo Mike Stanton Ricky Stone Miguel Tejada Ismael Valdez Mo Vaughn Ron Villone Fernando Vina Rondell White Jeff Williams Todd Williams Steve Woodard Kevin Young Gregg Zaun

Manny Alexander Rick Ankiel David Bell Marvin Benard Barry Bonds Ricky Bones Paul Byrd Ken Caminiti Jose Canseco Paxton Crawford Lenny Dykstra Bobby Estalella Ryan Franklin Jason Giambi Jeremy Giambi Jay Gibbons Troy Glaus Juan Gonzalez Jason Grimsley Jose Guillen Jerry Hairston Jr. Darren Holmes Ryan Jorgensen Wally Joyner Gary Matthews Jr. Rafael Palmeiro John Rocker Benito Santiago Scott Schoeneweis David Segui Gary Sheffield Derrick Turnbow Randy Velarde Matt Williams

"For my part," Hatfield said, "I would hope teams would voluntarily choose to cut their ties with players who have admitted steroid use. It saddens me that two former Finches, Gary Sheffield and Scott Schoeneweis, were named in the report. From this point forward, Darwin will not employ any of the active players listed above, but I don't want to hear about any talk of a 'blacklist'. I'm not telling others what to do. I just think hiring players who have been publicly linked to steroid use sends the wrong message, and until baseball can do a better job of policing itself, I'm just going to have to draw a line for my ballclub."